Wednesday, October 29, 2008


Early this week, a man wearing a "No on 8" button was beaten with a "Yes on 8" lawn sign in Torrance, CA.

Police are characterizing the assault as a possible hate crime.

The beater, 23-year old Joseph Storm, is scheduled to appear in the Torrance Superior Court today, Wednesday, for arraignment on a felony charge of a hate crime assault and a misdemeanor count for interfering with another's exercise of civil rights.

Authorities did not identify the victim.

However, it was mentioned that Storm had known the victim since junior high.

In the attack, Storm allegedly knocked the victim down with the Yes on 8 sign, then punched him in the face and choked him. He also called the victim a 'derogatory name for homosexuals' during the beating.

Good ol' winners in the South Bay. Maybe this move was an awful idea and I should've stayed with the classy peeps in So Cal. Ha.

Actually, speaking of Prop 8, this came up in a recent conversation with my dad, I don't even know how. Politics isn't usually on our "to discuss" list. Pops informed me that he'll be voting YES on Prop 8, because of his beliefs in the Bible. Fair enough. That same evening I heard a couple of young girls, probably FRESHLY 18, discussing the same thing and their religious beliefs swaying their vote on the matter.

While everyone's completely entitled to their opinion (that's why there's a VOTE in general), I just can't believe that people are still so old fashioned on the gay marriage issue. Aren't there much WORSE things happening in the world in our current time? The least concern in my mind is the fact that same gender individuals have fallen in love and want to be able to document that. Seriously though. Really? Get over it.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Earn Cash.... FAST!

This week has been super up and down. It's only Tuesday night.

Tonight as I was waiting far too long at the bus stop for how cold it was outside, I remembered that no matter where you are located or what it is you're doing, you're job sucks sometimes. ITS A JOB. That's why you get paid to do it. All in all I have a pretty bitchin' one. I have a tendency to let my emotions get the best of me. When it happens, I start thinking irrationally and generalizing my life to ALL be in accordance with my emotions at that time It's unhealthy. It's inaccurate. It's deceiving and it's unfair. Tonight before I lay down to ATTEMPT a solid nights sleep, I can honestly say that I'm content. Here, right now, alone on my couch. Alone in my apartment. Alone in a big city that is all new and uncomfortable. I'm content and I'm happy that I GET to be here. I"m happy that I get to have all these things and get to have this experience.

In other areas of life, I've successfully been here for almost two months now and have not yet had to experience shattered glass next to my car... or my car not being there.... or my car having a fancy yellow apparatus attached to the hubcap. Only two parking tickets. Really nothing to complain about in this city. But let's not jinx it.

And my apartment is coming together well... by this time, after all the places I've moved to in the last few years, I start to see how they all look the same. I don't like that. This issue needs to be confronted and we need to seek a solution. I think the solution may involve the crazy boys I work with that are ridiculous at painting walls...

In other pleasant news... I have friends coming to town this weekend. I get to wear my ridiculous Halloween costume. Get to bartend the party Friday night. Get to go to a rad fashion show Thursday night. Get PAYED Friday. Get to go to LB next weekend. Get to put on the fashion show the following weekend. Get to go home and see my family two weekends after that. Time if flying. It's fuckin nutts.

All in all, despite things that I wish were different right now or in the past, or what I hope will be different in the future.... ultimately at the end of the day, and even at random spontaneous moments of the day, I'm proud of myself. I'd rather fall than never to have flown at all. Safety is for the faint of hearts and dreamers never sleep.

The first, but definitely not the last.... show put on by yours truly.

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Oh, Random SOMA Party

Had a really fun night last night. Super random,.... super fun. I needed that.

And I'm learning some character traits about Boots McGee that I was never aware of.... she loves to steal my keys and hide them under the couch. I am trying to train her to be a domesticated animal. I'll follow up on this process.

Friday, October 24, 2008


Drinking more. Eating more. Smoking more. Fucking more.

Who prescribed that? I know for DAMN sure none of that works for me.

Good ol' Xanex? Help.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Sexy Time Part II

Watch out, Amsterdam!
San Francisco could be the first major U.S. city to decriminalize prostitution.
On November 4th, the city's voters will decide whether or not to approve Proposition K, a measure that forbids local authorities from investigating, arresting or prosecuting anyone for selling sex.
Prop K wouldn't legalize prostitution, per se, because California state law still prohibits it.
However, the measure would eliminate the power of local law enforcement officials to go after prostitutes.
Proponents say the measure will free up $11 million the police spend each year arresting prostitutes and allow them to form a union of sorts that would help protect their rights and safety.

...I don't know how I feel about this.

Sexy Time.

Well I'm about a week deep staying at my new place and last night I had THEE worst sleep of possibly my whole life. Well that's a stretch, but definitely since living here in San Francisco. Damn the walls are thin in my building...... Woke up more than 4 times throughout the night to my semi hotty neighbor boning the shit out of some broad next door. And unfortunately I heard every breath of it. So awful. All I have to say is I hope she gets knocked up over it! I'm so tired today. HA.

In other news, things are gettin' crazy, but in a good way, generally. Went through some bullshit over the weekend where I got an up close glimpse of the insanity of women. I watched this girl rip through a dude for completely unjust reasons.... so selfish and so self absorbed. So unreasonable. It makes me sick to think about. And the worst part is that the girl was me. But as usual everything happens for a reason and this is no exception. Lessons learned, and we can move on.

Getting busy with a bunch of freelance wardrobe gigs. Working on two separate films in the month of November and also diving into some more print work. I still get scared and nervous and have the initial inclination to back out, but I CANT and won't. I have to try or I'll never get anything I want. I have a plan....

*build up my list of credits (especially on movies and with film projects) that is at least a page long by this time next year.

I really want to work towards wardrobe for a full time job.... particularly on movie or television sets. Yea that means going back to LA, but let's not get ahead of ourselves. For the time being I can experience everything here while I'm building that credits list, making contacts and getting experience. Plus there's a lot to reach for as far as getting into costume for stage here. SAN FRANCISCO... Hello!?

And on the other hand, I was building the production calendar for my job yesterday and just slipped in all the deadlines for my own line. It got me really excited, fictitious or not, and I want to pursue it full force. Launch time: JULY 2009.
This is one that I've wanted for as long as I can remember. One of the biggest perks to this job was the possibility of getting to do that. I have to take full advantage, and that is what will take up my mental space in my spare time from this point on.

New plan: don't worry about anything else but getting my shit in line and being successful in my endeavors.

Unfortunately, I feel like you lose friends when you have this attitude. Does it make it wrong?? Maybe the reality is that if you're moving forward quickly, you're likely leaving others behind. While I don't know how to be anything BUT ambitious, it still leaves me feelings somewhat alone.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Death Van for Dummies.

I had to tell myself after this experience that if I HAD been killed by this man's drug induced awful driving last week when scoring a ride home from the art show, I fully deserved it. What a "small town girl" thing to do when you trustingly take a ride home with a semi-sketchy man you met five minutes earlier.

One should ALWAYS be cautious of a man rollin' around town with his white pomeranian.

And did I mention he drove a scary child molester van? Because he sure did.

Lesson learned and possible new marketing slogan: If you value your life, take Muni.

Social Mishaps.

Toilet paper following your cute boots around a popular bar. it almost happened to me this weekend but I caught it. PHEW.

Tripping in any way shape or form... even worse when you hit the ground. You can laugh if off, do the ever-popular "look behind you", or my favorite: stay on the ground and act like you're unconscious so no one will laugh, but be concerned and scared instead.

And the infamous food in your teeth when you're chattin up a hotty. DEATH. Our artshow photographer had no intention of catching this broad's precautionary actions on camera. Who passes by a mirror and DOESN'T look in it? If you say you don't, you're lying. I, however, can admit that I generally refrain from checkin' my grill. But hey,... hope she scored that night. HA

Friday, October 17, 2008

Lesson Learned.

I was completely irritated after the launch party last night. I can't even completely explain why..... it's amazing how ungrateful people are at an open bar. May I remind you, THIS SHIT IS FREE?! When the booze run out (which is often sooner rather than later), the crowd hits the trail like the circus is in town. I told a "patron" that the keg was tapped, but he should go get a tall can and come back and hang out longer. He responded with "Eh,.."

Really? You surely just drank nearly $100 of our booze for free. My favorite part is counting the douche's who didn't even mutter out a "thanks". NEWSFLASH: You won't lose any of your surely well deserved "street cred" by being polite to your bartender. Or by being a decent person in general. Just saying.

To make a long ass night short, the moral is:

never trust a someone sketchy lookin' dude with a Pomeranian.
Quick flash back:
Dude shows up at our party.
Dude has a less than stoked look on his face all night.
Dude talks to me for a bit outside, but is somewhat scary in a "could possibly be a serial killer" way.
Dude ends up drinking a beer with my coworker at a nearby bar where I stop by after the party's done.
Dude lives downtown, offers me a ride home. I accept. (stupid).
Dude walks me and coworker to his car, which is conveniently parked in the middle of the sidewalk on Fillmore.
Dude carelessly tosses the parking ticket off onto the ground, and exits his "spot" possibly with a minor sideswipe to a tree.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Some things never change.

"Contr​olled​ drink​ing doesn​'​t work for alcoh​olics​.​ Neith​er does absti​nence​.​ That'​s alcoh​olism​.​ Alcoh​olics​ can'​t drink​ and they can'​t not drink​.​ While​ they can drink​ sensi​bly on occas​ion,​ they
can'​t do so consi​stent​ly.​ And, while​ they can absta​in from drink​ing for a time,​ they can'​t do so persi​stant​ly and comfo​rtabl​y.​

"​There​'​s More to Quitt​ing Drink​ing than Quitt​ing Drink​ing"​ Dr. Paul O. p.13, Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous.

I admire the people sitting to my right that hang out and have a good time and don't HAVE to drink. They probably have no idea that I aspire to be like them. The confusing part comes into play when I simultaneously look to my left and see the people chillin' out and being safe and drinking responsibly.... how I aspire to be them at the same time. What do you do when you're heart tells you that you deserve better but your body says fuck it?

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

New Digs and New Potholes.

First night at the new place.
Makeshift bed on the ground.
New friends outside my window.

I always tend to have wildlife friends hangin' outside my house. I've developed, in only one night, a strong fear of these fuckers. I have this vision (nightmare, really) of one of them getting into my apartment and flying around..... Solutions?! Bug net?? Broom? A friend of mine thoughtfully suggested a blanket to throw over it. And then? C'mon dude. His next suggestion was a bb gun of sorts. Really? Am I a sniper now?
I'm gonna go with postin' up the fake owl out my window, or maybe resorting to a super soaker if need be. But that's the only firearms I'm packin.
And of course, the infamous finale to the first night at the new place...

Welcome to the neighborhood.

Monday, October 13, 2008

Productively Productive.

... when I'm at my best. Check out this website:
That chick's super rad. I did wardrobe on a photoshoot last weekend with a local photographer who wanted to re-create the same idea but right before their death.

It was a fun shoot and they all really liked what I did. Mish accomplished. Next: dead models.

I like.

The Tenderloin. Downtown San Francisco. Floods of people drinking tall cans in paper bags on the streets. A collection of all my dream boys put together, no one less than super steezy. Amazing art and live music inside the doors. I may have died and gone to heaven. I mean, what else is there?

Sunday, October 12, 2008

It's all happening.

Got a new place.
Got a roommate on my bad side.
Lost a friend.
Gained some keys.
Kissed someone I didn't mean to.
Drank too much.
Kissed someone I shouldn't have.
Pissed someone off.
Slept on the ground.
Worked my ass off.
Scheduled some upcoming photoshoots.
Met a new friend.
Mentally and emotionally cut a potential boy from the team.
Saw a bitchin' art show.
Went out with some new people.
Explored some new bars.
Met a man named Rojo from Maui.
Saw more hotty boys than I've ever seen in one condensed area.
Found myself in a difficult spot.
Didn't kiss someone even though I really wanted to.

And it's only Sunday.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Will Work For Boots.

Is it bad that I've spent my entire lunch break today scheming of what I can pawn at my house or what bill I can neglect paying in an effort to score these amazing boots I found online today??

I personally don't think so. Here's why.

I don't have a family to support. Just myself. It's not a problem to not eat for a few days as a result of an empty wallet. The reason it's worth it.... super cute shoes.
....Do I need to seek therapy?

When I was a youngin' in college, I'd blow my entire paycheck on getting tattooed. Every paycheck, the same thing. I knew that I wouldn't die of starvation (for one reason because my parents were helping to support me through school), and the worst case scenario is that I'd be super broke and not able to go out and blow money at the bar. But as a result I'd have a rad tattoo forever, only having to endure a two week pay periods worth of struggle. Being at a good stopping point in my tattoo endeavors, my spending habits have not made any real changes. I suppose it's just the goal at hand that has shifted.

Are the boots in the photo the boots in question?? No. Would I post the boots in question,....? The ones I won't be able to stop thinking about until I've put my cursed credit card number out into cyberspace..... I would NEVER post them on a blog like this, because I"d be spilling out a possibly still well kept secret. Why would you tell all your friends where a hidden treasure is? Aren't we all greedy little bitches, and isn't part of the REASON we spend $200 on a pair of shoes so that we get some kind of RECOGNITION for a rad find?

You feel the same way, you're just afraid to say it out loud. I'm onto you.

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Paper cup.

I was once in a place where I saw the good in everything. And though it might've taken me reminding myself to flip into that mental state, I was still able to do it. Recently I've noticed my quickness to complain and wishing and wanting and prodding and fiddling and stabbing and fucking with.

Yesterday someone said something about how we strive for things and say what we want and how bad we want it and where we want to be going and how we'll do anything to get there... we're so busy talking and wishing and wanting and prodding and fiddling and stabbing and fucking with that we didn't even notice that we're already there.